The Discovery

It has now been two days since the call. A literal call and I suppose a spiritual call. Adam & I both have a restlessness that needed an adventure. God obviously knew this long before I took notice and has been preparing us for the call.

On November 5, 2013, Adam was offered a job in Westminster, CO... and he accepted. This was our decision even before his interview; we were determined to trust God in His planning. I blame (and thank) our friend Chris Brister for one of his sermons because through it the Holy Spirit nudged me in the right direction.

Brister spoke about the awkward (his term, not mine) passage between Jesus ascending and the Spirit descending. It is a little snippet in Acts where the disciples are hurting from the deceit of Judas and the goodbye from Jesus. Peter gets up and states that a replacement for Judas is needed. Jesus chose 12 for a reason and they are determined to keep 12.

But as a 21st century white girl reading the story, it looks like Peter and the others make this decision all willy-nilly. They cast lots. LOTS.  My thoughts: What! They are gambling over who the next disciple is going to be?! Geez Peter haven't you messed up enough already? Wouldn't it be a little wiser to actually put some thought into this choice... you know maybe do a background check or get a resume? Thank goodness for Brister's explanation. The disciples did cast lots, but first they prayed. They asked God to choose His man. Make His own choice. Peter realized that he and the others had done nothing to gain the title "disciple." Jesus chose them without resumes or personality tests. It was His wisdom and love that compiled their group of 12. And so they prayed and asked Him to do it again. Then they cast lots as an unbiased way of choosing. They knew that God has full control over how the lots would fall, and they trusted Him.

Those words got stuck in my heart. Day-to-day I breathe words that say God in control, but how often do I really let Him make the decisions? How often to I believe that He can offer jobs or not? I don't. I think that the job offer is determined by Adam's performance and the other candidates. I don't trust that God is in control of these intimate details. Oh sure He gets credit for "big" control, over the world and all that... but not these details. That Sunday the Spirit was like, "Mmm girl check yourself. The Father loves you more than you realize. And that love extends into details, details that seem to be under man's control. His hand reaches farther than you know. Trust that and let Us lead you."

So here we are. Adam and I discussed the revelation of trust in God's control over details. We prayed that He would prepare our hearts for what He would give us. It was NOT easy. Y'all, I love where we are. I am absolutely in love with Norman, Oklahoma, and the people who live here. This is where I really found Jesus. It is where I realized that God does not look down on me with disappointment, but with delight. Such unbelievable words that I might have heard elsewhere, but they rang true here...in Norman. How can I leave a place with such deep roots? How can I leave these people that taught me the gospel and loved me, accepted me. All of me. This is where I met my husband. The truly better half of me (the tears have begun now, the first I have cried since the call). Here is where we found our first home. The place where our marriage was born. The scene of our newly wedded bliss and those nasty little fights that grew from molehills to mountains thanks to my flair for the dramatic. Maybe that is the depth of the root, the learning I have done in Norman.

Learning at the university, learning how to make one friend in the sea of 25,000 students, learning about the battle between my flesh and soul, learning the gospel, learning Jesus' role in my daily life and not just His death but His LIFE, learning how selfish I can be as a wife, learning how to love a selfish husband, learning the beauty of praying for a friend for 3 years then seeing her come into the fold and into the Kingdom, learning (through watching, not personal experience) the challenges and rewards of parenting... These are just a few.

I cannot imagine my lifeline without this moment in Norman. And God knew that too. The final year of high school, I had no dreams of coming to Norman and attending OU. I didn't really care where I spent the next four years, just as long as they weren't in my hometown. But then I stepped onto campus and just knew. This place was going to be my new home. Outside of parents. The place where I discovered myself. But Norman would be so much more than that.

My plan is to blog through this move and then our assimilation into the land of "natives." Okie to Native. I am still not sure why they refer to themselves as natives and have those bumper stickers, but I will find out soon enough.